(^ referenced later ^) My mom. UGH. She invades my privacy. Alot.

Once I mentioned to her that a $5 bill had been missing from my room, and she automatically took it upon herself to search all my drawers and my entire room, grabbing my Divas mag and asking me, "Why did you buy this?" in the tone of voice that just makes you feel guilty.

She does that alot. The reason I bought the magazine is not because I wanted to stare at the half-naked chick wrestlers, but because I chickened out of buying last year's copy because I was afraid of 'what people might think'. This year I bought it, just to prove a point to myself, really. That I don't care.

Yeah, and now she probably thinks I'm some perverted teenage lesbian. But you know, my mother jumps at the chance to embarrass me about myself.

My mother can actually be cool sometimes. She's the kind of mom that all my friends go, "Oh, Crys, your mom is so nice. And cool, she just lets you do whatever you want." Well, I think it's mainly because I don't take advantage of that. I don't go out too often, and when I do, she's perfectly fine. On one occasion, she even bought me a new outfit for a big dance. So in that way, yeah, she can be pretty cool.

But then there's the mom that makes me reduced to tears, feeling that I'm worthless or horrible. Yeah, she'll scream at me and even more so when I start to cry.

But she really can be cool sometimes. She's a nice mom, I guess. A bit of a tightwad, but nice.

Okay, off of that tangent...

Today. At school. Was moderately okay. There was no PE, which very much got me mad because as everyone (BWAHAHA) knows, I like gym. Actually, I don't. But lately I've been taking a liking to exercise. Who woulda thunk? :P

I saw Dan-lookalike today. Was less than impressed. I HATE his haircut with all my being, it's so short and common. I swear, before he cut it, it was a little long with cute bangs. Harry Potter hair. Now it's 'shallow faceless jerk hair.' *sigh* And he was flirting with one of the most popular girls at school, and that definitely didn't make what I think of him any better.

So yeah. I got another 50 on a test. The second in a week, when I've never before gotten this low of marks in my life. Goes to show how well I listen. To be honest, half my time in class is spent thinking about Dan-lookalike. So yeah, that's productive. Oh, and sometimes I think of porn. And ice cream. Be sure not to mix them. Well, I wouldn't object to the hottie with ice cream all over him. I'll have to imagine him with his old hair now, though. It's odd, I can't remember how his hair used to look. It was wavy, and a little long for a guy, and floppy, but very HP-ish when gelled up.

I wonder what he'd say if he knew I'd just written in my diary about him drenched in ice cream and about his hairdos.

I like to think he'd instantly fall for me, and we'd go out for a couple years, fuck, and then fall in love. Sounds good to me.

It was nice out today. When it's sunny, and the snow is all slushy, and I don't have to wear a coat. That weather automatically makes me happy, and loud, and giggly. I'm normally quiet, shy, sort of not-happy.

People like me. LOL. I really just realize that. At one point I didn't think anyone liked me, but really, everyone does. I can easily talk to anyone. Except for two people. One is a sports-crazed jerkoff who yells at me if I screw up his perfect game in any way. The other is a losery bitch that everyone hates. She tends to take her mood swings out on me even though I'm never less than perfectly nice to her.

But yeah. I have a little handful of friends, and alot of acquaintances.

We have a big exam tomorrow. If I had half a brain I would be studying, but I really don't. Instead, I'm sitting here typing this while keeping as few applications open as humanly possible and deleting alot of stuff so I can download the HP audiobooks which would save me from reading. LAZY ME! Naw. Not lazy. Just very tired. I've been so tired this week. I come home, slump onto the couch, nearly fall asleep 'til my mom comes home and wakes me up, then slump around the rest of the day. It's pretty horrible. I don't know why. I'm also getting these stabbing pains in places you really shouldn't be getting stabbing pains in, so that's not very great either. Been slacking off the workouts SO much. But then again, I'm kicking ass in PE, so maybe that'll cover for at least a small fraction of my 'too tired to work out' evenings.

I'm going to be buying a new bed! Yay me! It's going to be a double-size canopy bed, with super-cushy mattresses and nice sheets, and beautiful curtains over the canopy. I'm thinking maybe a black curtain, with hot pink mesh over it. But then again, I have a wacked-out sense of what's cool. Well, in bedding, anyways. I have a crazy-assed sense of style. Just not enough money to buy anything crazy-assed, so I end up in my blue jeans and sweaters.

And ... tomorrow's Friday. I used to dread weekends because it meant I couldn't see my Dan-lookalike, but now I don't mind. Which is rather crazy-assed in itself.

Today a friend and I walked past D-l on the way from a class. I was joking, and making fun of this guy (green eyes I get lost in) who teases me right back. lol. I was so goofy, I'm just not shy when he's not as near as he is in the following...

Today former-crush was standing around with me and two friends, then Dan-lookalike came and said something quietly to him about sports and they went out the door. My friends gave me funny looks when he came up, 'cause he was RIGHT behind me and I was obviously getting all flushed. So much for being calm and cool, EH?!   -_-; Yeah, I really shouldn't have told them. I just can't keep it to myself, though. And I'm still in love with his goofy, dewy, sexy voice. It was extra dewy today. ^.^

YAYNESS! My vewwy favorite Stephanie. ^.^

Oh, and can I just say: I rock! I am the co-owner of the best score in the english exam. YES! I *so* rock. It wipes out the two 50s I got in the past week. LOL.

I wrote this yesterday, BTW. Saved it in notepad 'cause Diaryland was down. So I'm going to add today's super-mini entry and make this possibly the longest entry I've written...

Dan-lookalike is hot. I just -- whenever I get over him, I fall for him all over again. lol. 'S so weird. And at lunch I got a Bruisin' Berry slurpee that turned my tongue, a bit of my lips, and tinted my teeth... BLACK. It was sooooooo funny. I, um, saw this hunk in another class. He's a hunk literally. His build is really solid, muscular, he's a hunk. And he has a really hot ass. ^.~ But anyways, he's, like, the post-pubescent one in class. He's actually growing this mini-beard which is very sexy 'cause it's just a half-centimetre long if that, and because of the hardly-post-pubescentness, it's really soft. Yeah, while the rest of the guys are gangly kids with high pitched voices and no evident facial hair. *sigh* Oh, but there's one exception. *another sigh* My Dan-lookalike. He be sooooo hott.

then + now