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HOLY FUCKING SHIT. I wrote the biggest fucking entry ever, then I heard a ding and IE went to some site in my favorites list where you can find free brushes. I'll type a little, but the fam will be back soon. SO FUCKING ANGRY.

I feel sick. Maybe it's because I had fast food for two of my meals, or because I've drank 2 litres of water in 40 minutes, but I feel like I'm going to throw up. I was just sitting here, looking for Harry Potter sweaters and reading Sache, and I just got the gross-est feeling. Eww.

Okay, my Daniel-lookalike was looking damn good today. He was wearing a brill blue shirt that brought out his eye colour really well. If you took this background, and the teal colour of the scrollbar, and mixed them around, you'd get the colour of his shirt. It was nice. He also has an abnormally big backpack. It's so weird how I either giggle like a 6-year-old on a sugar high or my heart jumps into my throat whenever I see him. He's brill. I walked right past him in the hall the other day. I didn't even notice it was him until I nearly passed him. He had dark circles under his eyes, which are only noticeable from as close as I was. He looked at me, too. I don't know if it was a look-look, or if it was just the once-over you give basically everyone you pass in the hallway. It might have been the second one. But I looked cool, almost snobbish, as I passed. Good thing no one saw me grinning as I passed him.

And my Dan-lookalike does look like Dan Rad. I've stared at enough pictures of Dan to know. I know every friggin' birthmark on his face, from studying his facial features in trying to sketch him. It didn't really work out. I once drew Jonathan Taylor Thomas, who I was obsessed with bad-yet-not-as-bad-as-this back in the third grade, and it was kickass. Better than anything I can do now. The Emma Watson picture I drew is pretty okay, I wish I had a scanner to scan it. I also wish that I could send it to her on the set of the movie and she'd love it so much that she'd take it on the set and show her castmates and they'd love it too. But it sucks ass, lol, that prolly won't happen.

I've told 6 friends about my Dan-lookalike obsession, three of whom are in his class. Two were supportive, like, "Oh, it's cool, I used to like him too," sort of deals. Others thought I was crazy. But no-crazy, just have the hots for a really fucking hot guy. He intimidates me, though, I doubt I'll be good enough for him.

All this week I've had these stages where one day I'll hate myself and my body so much that I'll cry and break things. Other days, I'll walk around like I'm the fucking Queen, just bursting with pride. Right now I have a cold, and sound really gross, so I'm firmly in-between.

But he's friends with and teases all the girls, yet I've never heard him speak. Augh, the misery I'm in.

I hope I can wake up early, do 10-minute taebo, and find the hot low-risers I want, hopefully getting over this bloat by the morning. I also hope I can do at least a hundred sit-ups.

Yeah, but anyway, I went to school. Did work. Not much there.

"To the well organized mind, death is but the next great adventure." -- Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter

then + now